Expectations in Relationships

Hello World,

We have all done it…

Why do we expect a great deal from our loved ones? Why do we expect them to just know what to do or say what we want we want to hear? And what if the roles were reversed? Maybe you always expect a birthday present from your parents. Maybe you expect your romantic partner to read your mind all the time. Maybe you expect your best friend to not be late or make you wait for an event. Yes, we have all done it. We all expected and became upset when our expectations were not met. But is if fair? We are missing a point when we put the “expectation” strain our loved ones.

Goal oriented expectations…

Expectations are good for goals and for us. If we are working towards achieving our goals we should always forecast for the outcome we expect. This will help us create plan A, B, and C to tackle any sort of obstacles we may come across; Adaptability – Your Biggest Competitive Advantage.  Having goal oriented expectations is a tool to prevent failure. For example, I know I am expected to complete a 30 minute abs workout every day to achieve the expected body type I want to achieve. If I fail to work out every day then my expectations are not met.

But when that expectation is on someone else…

You are putting in effort to achieve an expected result, is different from when you expect someone else to fulfil your goals. Having expectations on others  behavior is unfair. We forget that! We are good old emotional human beings after all. We are close to our friend, family and loved ones. We take their love for granted and think, hmm they love me so they must know me so well, therefore I expect them to know exactly what I am expecting from them! High expectations on your loved ones is another word for selfish and toxic. We completely forget that they have emotional and physical limitations. They have their own thinking and perceptions, they might not see a situation as eye to eye.

Some people just like taking and not giving. We are selfish because we expect our loved ones to not expect the same in return. We expect from them but become cold when they expect from us. Perhaps it’s because when the roles are reversed we have limitations too!

Roles Reversed…

Do you want to be dependant on your spouse 80% and expect them to fulfill your share of goals? While you put in 20% in the relationship. That is a pretty unhealthy relationship. First off, you are placing strain on your partner. Second, you are giving away your independence, (never become dependant on anyone!). Third, you telling me that you lack self-esteem and you need someone else to help carry your share of work.

A good relationship is when the partners are working on goals in parallel. They share feedback and are constantly motivating each other but they let each other keep their own identity. They let each other work on their own goals and success. And when the two bring their knowledge, and success together they become a complete power couple! These two are unstoppable!

Until next time…

Dla

 

 

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3 thoughts on “Expectations in Relationships

  1. Hello,
    Pleasure to meet you and thank you for visiting my blog page and having a follow, I appreciate the support. I look forward to reading more blog post from you in the future.

    Shay-lon

    Like

  2. Hello dla, thanks for your thoughts–I’ve read through many this morning and find the ‘relationship expectations’ a good one to repost the day before St. Valentine. (Patron Saint of the Disappointed?) Thank you much for following pointdevueparis!

    Like

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