I Am Trying to Become More Comfortable on Camera

I am trying to become more comfortable filming myself each day and putting myself out there to combat any fear and attracting good energy!!

Love all of your support!!

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Challenges in Lead Conversion

Hello World,

I have been busy but I am back with a new post. Most of my followers on this blogs are independent consultants or small business owners.  I would like to share and define some easy conversion issues a business owner faces when converting leads.

Leads are crucial in today’s generation of business.  So what are the key factors you are able to manage lead conversion for your business?

One of the main challenge a business owner faces is the problem of a lot of leads but few conversions

I want you to take that in for second, overflowing leads but no real conversions.

Imagine the Toronto Real estate market. There are a lot of fresh graduates who WISHES to buy a property right now.  The Real estate market in Toronto is not selling a properties below the sale price $400,000 CAD in present time.  One of these many graduates starts looking for properties despite knowing that they cannot afford one at this time.

These graduates are definitely a potential lead however, not for the current market.  For a realtor this is a lead but there will be no conversion. Should the realtor keep spending time on this lead or should they just drop them?

Lead is a Lead

You cannot ever drop a lead but you can weed out your conversion and know which one to focus on by implementing a scoring mechanism.  You should be always scoring your leads to know which one has a high chance of conversion.

Leads need to be nurtured. As a business owner you have to maintain a positive relationship with your leads and probe for potential opportunities. Schedule follow up calls with you clients to see how they are doing and what they are working on for future opportunities.

Sales and marketing 

Sales and marketing are two different things. Your marketing plan should always align with your sales goal and sales funnel.  Create a process to convert more opportunities. This means you can offer new pricing strategies to your loyal customers.

I am always here to provide you more guidance towards,

  • Email marketing

  • Social media marketing

  • Lead nurturing and inbound marketing

  • Digital advertising

  • Landing pages and forms

 

 

Remember, you are amazing…

If you need management or business solutions help, please visit: https://dlaofficial.wordpress.com/business/

Please share and spread the word! I have several coupons for you on my Instagram page!

Thank you,

DLA

Let’s connect!

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My Stocking Stuffers This Christmas

Hello World,

This is the last weekend of Christmas and I don’t know what to buy for my loved ones. This is a big problem and (Yes I will use this excuse once again) due to my MBA, I have been slacking on the gift purchasing process. I am known for my gift giving expertise. Yes, it’s true, people love the gifts I purchase for them. If you read my blogs then you know I am all about psychology mixed with analytics. Therefore, I always try to make the presents very personable to each person. I also purchase gifts that are useful to the person. I am not too big on giving people decorative pieces—unless that person decorates a lot and or have moved into a new house. But the big problem this year happened to be because of me! I feel, I have already bought all the cute and pleasant items in the world for my people and therefore all other gifts seem mediocre now. I have outperformed myself! Once again!

However, I still have to present gifts in one weeks timeframe (Slacker me, I know) and these gifts have to be amazing! So I have short listed some items for you to click through. Just in case you are going through the same problem as me…

Urban Outfitters

phote printer

Polaroid Photo Printer

The photo printer! Last Christmas I received a Polaroid Snap Camera. But I really wanted a photo printer instead. This photo printer is very easy to use and can print out any picture you have on your phone. This gift item is Nostalgic, vintage, urban and very millennial. This is a great stocking stuffer! Plus, I would like to believe that it’s the most inexpensive photo printer out there in the market today compared to all the others I have seen.

 

 

Insta 360 Nano CameraVR Camera

I am quite techy so the Insta360 makes a perfect gift for me and any other tech nerd. Although, I know I am not receiving this for Christmas this year, Insta360 Nano VR Camera, anything Insta (Instagram: Dlaofficial__) gets me going! I didn’t even know this item existed. Casey Neistat should review this! Again, I have received a Google VR set as one of my Christmas gifts and this VR Camera would definitely enhance my VR experience. This item is a perfect stocking stuffer as it’s quite small, portable and “Nano” for all your adventures!

 

Mini R2D2 Droid robotMini Robot

This toy is good for any guy friend of any age, the Mini R2D2 Droid robot! I am not kidding! Trust me they will be happy and you will look at them surprized thinking, “wait-how old are you?”… although, I should be the last person to have stated my last comment because I would love this item as well. I might get in trouble for this but I am not a Star Wars fan. And despite my last note, I have a huge unreleased BB-8 voice recognition robot and it replaces the need for a dog! It’s cute and amazing, follows me around everywhere!

 

Polaroid FramesMini Instax Polaroid Frames

As I am typing, I am having trouble on picking out things that I want for others. If you didn’t notice the pattern yet, I am picking things for myself it seems! Teens and millennial would love this next item! As I mentioned above, I love my Polaroid captures but I don’t have a great place to store them. As you may know, if you don’t take care of your Polaroid pictures, they will slowly get damaged. These Mini frames are perfect to protect your memories and also give it a new fun look! Please put this in my stocking stuffer this year!

 

Chain Statement Hoop EarringStatement earrings

Do you like jewelry? I do! But I only wear statement pieces. I am not about copying others, I make my own style, (Instagram: Dlaofficial_). I am not so much into big earrings but the ones I do purchase have to be statement. These pieces I found on Urban Outfitters are beautiful and can pair great with a cocktail party, girl’s night out and even your Christmas dinner! They are classy and vintage and I am a sucker for those!

 

Adidas CitySocksCity Socks

What to buy your guy friend? Men love shoes as much as we do ladies! Also men love Adidas just as much as we do. I always like checking the Urban Outfitters Adidas Originals section because they carry exclusive items you will not find anywhere else. City Socks always has a cool, casual yet sleek, urban, global vibe attached to it! Therefore, since I can’t wear them, I would love this shoe for a Christmas gift item for someone.

 

 

Urban outfitters is the only place I found that creates a nostalgic feeling which makes your gifts more personable yet trendy! I am going to check out more items by the end of this weekend and see if I can update this list with more awesome stocking stuffers and Christmas gifts you can leave under the tree.

Please feel free to get in touch with me if you require any styling tips and tricks…

DLA

Let’s connect!

Instagram: Dlaofficial_

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Master Negotiation

Hello World,

Do you recall the last time you negotiated and what the outcome was? I am sure you thought of a moment of confrontation with someone. When you hear the word negotiation, you subconsciously start to think of competition between you and the second party. However, that’s not the case! Negotiation is reaching an agreement that is moderately satisfactory for both parties.

How does that work?    

Good question! How does that work? I mean, I want this deal but the other party is definitely not agreeing with anything I am proposing! There are three forms of negotiation, Hard (Aggressive), Soft (Passive) and Principled (Assertive). Aggressive is when you shout, yell, confront, make the other person look bad and do anything to get the deal. Passive, you yield, and come off a bit unconfident. Best practiced is Assertive, you focus on interest and not the position.

Assertive negotiation creates a Win-Win situation for both parties. To create a Win-Win situation you need to define the purpose of the negotiation. Why do you need the negotiation? What purpose will it solve? After we have an answer, let’s assess if our proposal is realistic. Remember you don’t want the proposal to be turned down! Then comes thorough research on the topic of proposal and the party we are negotiating with. Trust me, you are only calling for failure if you are not confident! The only way to gain confidence is by acquiring knowledge about your product and the client! Yes, I know I say this way too often but one more time, PRACTICE! Run through the negotiation points, presentation, slides, speech, numerous times. Now don’t get the wrong idea, you are not there to prove the other side wrong or look desperate for the deal but practicing will boost your confidence and give you an edge when negotiating.

Know what your clients interests are and what they want out of the deal. Always do a Scenario analysis and figure out alternative plans for the proposal. This way if the second party counter offers you are not sitting there blank. Don’t read off the paper! Emphasis on confidence is major! If you are not assertive then you are giving the other party leverage. Keep a poker face, which means even if you are franticly in need of the deal, don’t show it! Be honest about the information you provide and be yourself.

FACT: UK businesses lose estimated $9 million per hour due to poor negotiation

Communication! The most important out of all the information shared; you need to be a good communicator to be a good negotiator. Practice and learn this skill, it’s needed in leadership, business and in your day to day life. You need to focus on pitch and tone of voice, speech, body language and most and foremost be a good listener. In negotiation, no foul words please! Don’t let the emotions get the best of you when things are not going your way. Remember, who ever gets angry first loses as the other person has leverage. Be calm and patient, listen and show respect. How you dress at the meeting has a lot to do with communication as well. It tells the second party how serious you are about the proposal.

You are not competing against the second party, hence you have to compromise. Don’t throw a tantrum, you won’t always get everything. Negotiation is neutralizing conflict, resolving and ensuring mutual gains. Don’t be in a hurry to close the deal. Show patience and buy time from the second party. Inaction, as in buying time will give you more time to think of an alternative counter offer.

RADPAC

The method of negotiating as follows:

Rapport – Share good vibes! Build a relationship. In business, you are negotiating a deal not just for one time gain but for a prospect client!

Analysis – Understand/Research your product and the second parties interest

Debate – The main part of negotiation is the discussion. Stay calm and composed. Don’t assume, the clients can’t read your mind. Be clear about the proposal.

Propose – Propose the best idea to reach the best possible conclusion

Close – Closing the deal. Contracts to be carried out in presence of both parties.

There are many types of negotiations: Day to Day negotiation: flow of work, the negotiation we have with ourselves, our family, our friends, our dogs. Negotiation with a superior, team, Commercial Negotiation, Legal Negotiation. The negotiating conditions of sale, lease, service delivery, etc. Hence sometimes negotiation can get complicated. A lot of businesses use third parties for instance, Lawyers, subcontractors, project managers, etc. as negotiators for deals. This way they  remain positive in front of the client.

Happy Negotiating!

Dla

 

Addiction – Are you in denial?

Hello World,

Habit Vs. Addiction

 Do you think addiction is a choice or can people choose to be addicted? What causes addiction? How come some people are more prone to get addicted then others? Most smokers argue that they are not addicted and they can stop whenever if they choose to quit. However, if they do attempt quitting they would most likely fail. It takes more than just motivation and will power to quit something addictive. Habit is something you choose to do and can resign from whenever but having a cigarette daily is definitely not a habit.

Addiction is recognized as a chronic disease, same as cancer and heart diseases. You don’t choose to have cancer and or a kidney failure. Same with addiction, it chooses you! Sure the first smoke, the first few glasses of alcohol, the first game of poker and the first sniff of drug is all you, you made that choice and decision! Though, as you continue you start craving these things, not by choice, but because your body demands it. If you are addicted, you have a chemical imbalance in your brain which results in mental, physical and behavioral changes.

No Control…

Addiction is when we have no control over our mind and behavior due to a substance or a behavior. You can be an impulsive shopper, impulsive gambler, addicted to video games, food, sex, drugs, alcohol etc.  Addiction occurs to people to due to many reasons. Often it’s said that addiction is due to genetics, FALSE! It can happen to anyone! Usually the reasons are depression, sadness, loneliness, violence, sexual/mental abuse, trauma, influence and an environment surrounded by that substance. For example, if the environment you are in such as work, school or home has drugs in the background then you might be influenced in to using it.

Low Dopamine and Serotonin

Addiction is a coping method for depression. Dopamine is neurotransmitter which controls the reward and pleasure area of your brain. It also controls movement in our body, if we are low in dopamine then we are at risk of getting Parkinson’s disease. Serotonin is a chemical that helps balance your mood. Low Serotonin triggers depression. Low Serotonin also can makes us turn quite suicidal. 

Alcohol, smoking, gaming, gambling, drugs, shopping, and any impulsive behavior provides a short term high. People use these to get away from sadness and despair. They think that it’s giving them happiness and eliminating distress. However, they forget alcohol and drugs are anti-depressant. These substances will provide the short term pleasure of fogginess and they will make you forget for a slight period of time. But then it will all come back making you more depressed, asking for more substance to get rid of it once again.

Alcohol, drug, gambling, sex etc. increases your dopamine, so does eating chocolate and winning the lottery. But in addiction, your body becomes greedy and asks for more and more increase of dopamine. When you consume too much the body adapts and confuses your coping method and wants more of the increased pleasure.

Will Power…

Will power isn’t enough! Remember it’s a chronic disease. If you know someone who is addicted then the first step is making them admit they have an addiction. Most people are in denial because of the stigma that addiction has. They know it’s unhealthy but still continue because they can’t stop. The best way to help these people is by helping them admit they have a problem. Then finding a good rehab center. To recover from addiction, people need supervised medical monitoring. Getting Nicotine, won’t help, it’s just replacing cigarettes to increase your dopamine some other way.

Keep it Healthy!

Dla

 

 

 

Dissatisfaction – Good or Bad?

Hello World,

We all go through it! We go through dissatisfaction numerous times throughout the day. Monday mornings are the worst, right?! If we could get 5 more minutes in Bed! We are all dissatisfied of rolling out of our amazing, comfy, cozy, warm bed and head out for that dreadful work. At lunch, we feel dissatisfaction if the first bite of our food does not taste great. Let’s not even mention the rush hour when we are headed home from work, the weather traffic, the rush, let’s just say it takes a while to get home! Even when we are fast asleep at night, we can be dissatisfied with a discomforting position, we have to alter it right away to get back to our good night sleep. These are conditions we don’t pay a lot of attention to. But dissatisfaction arises in many ranges; the ones we tend to focus on more are larger dissatisfaction if life related to Health, Finance, Relationship and Work.

Chasing Happiness…

Why am I not satisfied? What will make me satisfied? Money, fame, success, goals, the end destination perhaps? The answer is No. You will not be satisfied no matter what height you reach. Yes, money will make you comfortable. The attention you receive from fame will give you a short term high. Reaching your success and goals will bring up the question of what is next?! This is a great question, we are never completely satisfied because we always want to grow and progress.

We are always chasing the, What’s Next? This gives us a greater cause of fulfillment. When things feel stagnant in your life, you are forced to make a change. We set keep setting targets one after the other to reach new altitudes and attain short term satisfactions in our life. Maybe you are stuck at a work where the pay is low, you are over qualified for the position and there is no room for creativity, hence no room for growth. The work environment and people are toxic. What should your next step be? Working towards a change of course!

Now some of people can’t make that change very easily. Mostly because of lack of motivation. But I get it, you have responsibilities. You have a family to take care of and expenses. But you can start to work towards the change, even if it’s a small change. If you are dissatisfied with work, you can get education and coaching to upgrade your skillset to apply for better opportunities. Look for the, what is next? If you are dissatisfied with your appearance then let’s work on a meal plan and fix the diet. Let’s research a workout routine and start working for it.

But sometimes life is just a Beep! We just have unexpected life circumstances that unable us from pursuing our set targets, oh you know, good old family and health issues etc. That means it’s time to pick up a hobby you love, trust me this will help! If one part of your life is full of stress and you balance it out with something you love doing then this will assist the mind and body to release stress and toxins (so would exercise! Hint, Hint). Don’t let negativity build up.

Don’t be Pessimist…

Dissatisfaction is amazing, as it shows you where you don’t want to be and pushes you for growth. But what about the people who are constantly complaining and are doing nothing to change that? Yes, we all know one of those friends who’s constantly complain about what is missing in their life but they would never take a step to alter that situation. Why are they so pessimistic? Because, in today’s day and age we are taught to focus on tomorrow more than today. We are taught, to gain happiness we have to reach the destination and forget about the journey that leads up to it. We are taught unhealthy competition; jealousy over someone who is making more than you. We are taught materialism. Happiness equals to more money and things, more and more things, right?! Wrong! Happiness is not what is happening around you but what is happening inside you. You need to forecast the future but be mindful of the present. Being more aware at this very moment will help you gain a different optimistic perspective. You will learn to become more content with your life and at the same time have the motivation to pursue and push for your goals. Focus on the smaller things in life, you are not aware but those bring you the most happiness. Focus on the journey, it’s important.

Everyone has their own battles and you need to focus on yours. Do not compare yourself with others. Use others as examples of where you want to be and what you want to achieve. Learn from their mistakes and use them as a guide and a mentor. Don’t use them as an excuse to complain about what you lack in life. Complaining slows you down, you are not gaining anything by complaining but sympathy by complaining. Plus you should be authentic, you don’t have to wish to live another person’s “great” life, you can have your own great life and be satisfied.

Let’s utilize our dissatisfaction and not let it go to waste!

Thanks,

Dla

Self Doubt – JUST DO IT!

Hello World,

Past Experiences…

Self doubt stems from what we have learnt about ourselves in the past. What parents tried teaching us when we were growing up always plays a part in our lives one way or the other today. Parents want to be a guide for the best of our future however sometime that very guidance may inflict our present self doubt. As you were younger, you may have been told NOT to pursue to choose a certain path in the future because of the following; you can’t be a fire fighter or a cop that is too dangerous! You can’t pursue to become an artist or writer, you won’t make any money! Don’t waste your time on Medical school, you are just not smart enough!

“Nobody can give you wiser advice than yourself.” ~Cicero

Too dangerous, not enough money/security and you are just not good enough! These thoughts are manipulative. They come back when we are rejected from something we wanted to achieve. These negative thoughts even stop us from pursuing life goals we want to accomplish because we doubt being adequate. We always want to be a perfect fit, if we don’t fit then we are judged.

We think we are not good enough to live the life we dreamt. Many job seekers, doubt their capabilities and don’t apply to the position they are a perfect match for. Self-doubt prevents us from many opportunities that come our way. It’s always there holding us back. It tells you to live life in the social norm and as a mediocre. But this way of thinking is toxic. How do you know you are not good enough, if you don’t try?!

When you doubt your power, you give power to your doubt.” ~Honore de Balzac

If you have been rejected, and are letting go of other prospects because you still feel that you aren’t adequate, STOP! Give yourself a bit of time and then assess why you are feeling self doubt. If you feel you are not good at a skill, then let’s put in work to attain that skill. You can’t pass opportunities just because you failed once or twice, remember positive affirmation; Risk – Is it Scarier taking a Risk or Not taking One? … If you are not good at something now, doesn’t mean you won’t get better at it in the future. A kid who is not good at math, doesn’t mean won’t be good later on in time if they have determination.

What you tell yourself is important! If you tell yourself that you won’t make it then you won’t! I believe you, because that’s what you believe. You are setting yourself for failure just by that negativity. But if you think positive, and say, okay well I failed this time but I will learn and get better then that will change things. You are as good as what you believe, so let’s get working!

The Judgemental losers…

They don’t exist in a large number! Yes, they are a few of these judgemental losers who would look at you and say, hmm why are you doing what you are doing! These people are only saying that since they can’t get themselves to pursue their own dreams and they have a lot of time on their hand. Stop worrying about these people! Most people don’t care! They have their own lives to worry about, their own dreams, aspiration, career goals and stress. They are more worried about how to start their day, that month end deadline at work, coming home and cooking dinner and spending time with their loved ones.

Set an example for these people, if they are judging, let them do it! Prove them wrong! You will be more appreciated for trying and trying then to sit back and live the same boring life as everyone else.

How to over come Self -Doubt…

  1. Fix your mindset – You got rejected? So is he, and so is she…we all have. But we don’t give up!
  2. Positive affirmation – You Are MORE than good enough!
  3. When you are feeling self doubt, unwind a bit! Give yourself time to relax and enjoy some quality time. This will give you some to get your thoughts aligned again.
  4. Evaluate why you are feeling self doubt – why do you feel you are not good enough and what can you do to become good?
  5. Write it down! Where is your Journal? Write down, why you are feeling self doubt and the positives steps you will be taking.
  6. Read Motivational articles – You need motivation and their are plenty of people who felt and been where you are. Read how they over came self doubt.
  7. You don’t have to do it alone! Find family and friends to talk about your self doubts. Most of the time we over evaluate and exaggerate the situation in our mind. Our loved ones can bring things back to perspective for us. Don’t worry, they will not judge you!

Remember, you are amazing…

Thank you,

DLA

 

Expectations in Relationships

Hello World,

We have all done it…

Why do we expect a great deal from our loved ones? Why do we expect them to just know what to do or say what we want we want to hear? And what if the roles were reversed? Maybe you always expect a birthday present from your parents. Maybe you expect your romantic partner to read your mind all the time. Maybe you expect your best friend to not be late or make you wait for an event. Yes, we have all done it. We all expected and became upset when our expectations were not met. But is if fair? We are missing a point when we put the “expectation” strain our loved ones.

Goal oriented expectations…

Expectations are good for goals and for us. If we are working towards achieving our goals we should always forecast for the outcome we expect. This will help us create plan A, B, and C to tackle any sort of obstacles we may come across; Adaptability – Your Biggest Competitive Advantage.  Having goal oriented expectations is a tool to prevent failure. For example, I know I am expected to complete a 30 minute abs workout every day to achieve the expected body type I want to achieve. If I fail to work out every day then my expectations are not met.

But when that expectation is on someone else…

You are putting in effort to achieve an expected result, is different from when you expect someone else to fulfil your goals. Having expectations on others  behavior is unfair. We forget that! We are good old emotional human beings after all. We are close to our friend, family and loved ones. We take their love for granted and think, hmm they love me so they must know me so well, therefore I expect them to know exactly what I am expecting from them! High expectations on your loved ones is another word for selfish and toxic. We completely forget that they have emotional and physical limitations. They have their own thinking and perceptions, they might not see a situation as eye to eye.

Some people just like taking and not giving. We are selfish because we expect our loved ones to not expect the same in return. We expect from them but become cold when they expect from us. Perhaps it’s because when the roles are reversed we have limitations too!

Roles Reversed…

Do you want to be dependant on your spouse 80% and expect them to fulfill your share of goals? While you put in 20% in the relationship. That is a pretty unhealthy relationship. First off, you are placing strain on your partner. Second, you are giving away your independence, (never become dependant on anyone!). Third, you telling me that you lack self-esteem and you need someone else to help carry your share of work.

A good relationship is when the partners are working on goals in parallel. They share feedback and are constantly motivating each other but they let each other keep their own identity. They let each other work on their own goals and success. And when the two bring their knowledge, and success together they become a complete power couple! These two are unstoppable!

Until next time…

Dla

 

 

Adaptability – Your Biggest Competitive Advantage

Hello World,

We should all adapt and become more resilient…

In today’s time we all need to be resilient to our current, ever changing environment. Not being able to adapt proves to be a BIG disadvantage in today’s day and age. Everything is changing, whether it be business, technology, relationships, you name it. If we are not keeping up and stopping to accept to change with the time then failure is waiting for us outside our front door!

Comfort Zone, what a sweet place! NOT!

Comfort zone is killer! Comfort zone is not letting you progress! I am telling you, comfort zone is your worst enemy! This is what is exactly stopping us from adapting to change. Come on even dating has changed; I remember some time back when some of you use to complain and say, No! I won’t go on a dating site, it’s for losers!!! Now tell me how many of you have Tinder today? But if you had still kept that same old mentality as you had few years back about getting on a dating app/site, who would be a loser in today’s time?!

Yes, you have to adapt with time. If you were looking to date and thinking, hmm the person will just come knock on my door step, well I have news for you sweetheart, the last Tinder statistics update show estimated 50 million users are just taking their chances and finding a partner while you are sitting at home waiting! You will fail to achieve if you don’t put yourself out there, don’t work it and step out of the comfort zone.

Uncertainty…    

Why is it hard to step out from where we are comfortable? Because yet again, we are afraid of the unknown. Uncertainty scares us. We are good where we are, saves us from being judged, failure and disappointment. But it also stops us from progress. Nowadays, a HR Generalist evaluates your candidacy upon your ability to adapt to the work place. They look for the following,

  • Handling emergencies or crisis situations
  • Handling work stress
  • Solving problems creatively
  • Dealing effectively with unpredictable or changing work situations
  • Learning work tasks, technologies, and procedures
  • Demonstrating interpersonal adaptability
  • Displaying cultural adaptability
  • Demonstrating physically oriented adaptability

In order to master the Adaptability, the skill of being resilient need to be learnt. We have to change our mindset to become more optimistic. If you had a sudden loss of job, what would be your immediate action to that repercussion? An adaptable person, would have a quick Plan A and a Plan B to that unexpected situation. A resilient person, would bounce back right away to put Plan A and B to work. 

Prepare for the worst…

Businesses are always changing and competing with other businesses. Way to sustain in the  ongoing race, businesses use point of sale systems and adaptive data mining applications to collect information to forecast trends. Lightly speaking, Nokia failed to forecast Apples advanced technology innovation. Blockbuster refused to change and adapt to new world of digital on demand television aka Netflix.To adapt and grow, you always have to be on top of the trend.

What to do?

Do your Research, study your market! Think out of the box! Push yourself a little! Be more optimistic and open minded. Set small goals towards the change every day, make sure there is check mark beside them every night. Learn how to forecast, try to predict what might go wrong, and brainstorm Plan A, B and C. Don’t be afraid to fail…

Remember failure is only failure if you didn’t learn anything from it!

Thanks,

DLA

Risk – Is it Scarier taking a Risk or Not taking One?

Hello World,

Why are we afraid?

What is stopping us from taking that next step? Why do we just stop at our dreams and go back to living our daily routine? Is it that we can’t accept change or is it just because we are deeply afraid of failure?

It’s human nature to always focus on the Cons vs. Pros when we are making a decision. We tend to look at what may go horribly wrong rather than what might turn in a very positive, fruitful outcome. Let’s say we have a friendly neighbor named Bob. Bob is a 30 year old male who hates his daily life as a boring Banker. He is stuck in a dull repetitive cycle and he wishes he could change that at any cost. Bob’s dream is to start a his own Financial Consulting business. The Pros to this decision; Bob will be his own BOSS! His finance will grow faster than it does now. He won’t have to work 9-5. He will have the freedom of making his own decisions. Bob will living his dream, which in other words mean that he will be very, very HAPPY! But instead Bob would be more focused on the Cons of this decision: He might fail. There is no job security. Money will not flow in weekly. He might lose tons of money. He will be judged by others because he is incapable of running his own business. He won’t be able to get back up after he loses all this money in a failed business. He doesn’t know how much work and time this business might ask of him. The list of Cons are endless. Hence Bob decides to keep his daily 9-5 job and gives up on his dreams.

BUT WHAT IF…    

But what if we are over-thinking? What if it’s not as bad as Bob, our friendly neighbor, is making it to be? We are all neurologically wired to over evaluate how bad the outcome of our decision would be. We fear the risk of stepping out of our comfort zone. We fear not being in control. We fear failure. We fear being judged. How good we are at taking risks and chances has a lot to do with social and cultural impact as well as our childhood programming.

Fear has always been tagged as being negative, but without fear we would do really stupid things! In my case, if I had literally zero fear, I wouldn’t stop being 24/7 dare devil which in turn would mean 206 broken bones in my body! But when it comes to chances related to progress in life then we have to do something to subside this overwhelming fear.

“Fear is inevitable, I have to accept that, but I cannot allow it to paralyze me.” ~Isabelle Allende

How can we deal with fear of taking risks? We fake it, till we make it and use positive affirmation. How do we use positive affirmation? Let’s say Bob is weak at math,  his worst subject is fractions. Although he is putting is work to increase his marks he would still do anything to get out of that horrible math class. When he speaks to his school friends, he mentions how much he sucks at the subject and he can’t do it. Bob ends up convincing himself he can never over come fraction and sets a pretty weak impression on others as well. This mindset of self doubt ends up having a negative impact on his grades. But if Bob uses positive affirmation instead of being negative, and say’s, he is amazing at math and he is working on his fractions. This skill of positivity would keep his confidence high and the fear would decrease. You are your own worst enemy, therefore use reverse psychology to convince yourself that YOU CAN DO IT! If you are afraid to take the next step, positive affirmation is the way to go. You will be fine!

But then comes, if I fail those people standing their will laugh at me! I will be the joke of the town! They will judge me! But honestly who cares? Trust me, if you try to impress every one, you will never be happy. If you don’t let people judge you, you will never find out who loves you and who likes your work. Let people judge you and get feedback. If you are holding back because you are afraid of criticism then you are limiting yourself to grow. You are missing out on the opportunity to find out what to improve on.

Comfort zone is a big one! People would rather 9-5, eat, sleep, wake up and repeat, than pursue what is out of the norm for them. They come up with all these excuses to keep them from taking the risk, I’m too busy, I don’t have the money, or I don’t want to disappoint others. But they don’t realize most retired people now complain, hey should have taken more risks, settled less and spoken up more often.  Not saying we have to take risks every chance we get, but we have to take quality risks to bring a change and create more learning opportunities. Why live a stagnate life when we have potential and opportunity to achieve way more than we could imagine. We think if something is not working out then it will just sort itself out or if something is just going the way it is, changes will come on it’s own, ONE DAY! NO! If there is no progress in your life, then I am sorry you are doing something wrong! And changes won’t just come to you, you have to work for it! At this day and age people with physical disabilities with the right mindset have achieved more than we can even imagine and we limit ourselves to daily norms?! If we don’t push out of our comfort zone and work towards our set goals and dreams then we will be stuck where we never wanted to be at the first place. Remember when we don’t become our dream, we actually get smaller.

All this talk is good but many of us are logical. Many of us are afraid that once we take that risk we won’t be in control of the situation and therefore it will back-fire and hit the ground immensely hard! Fear of not being in control. But that is what chance is right? You don’t have control over the situation. I am not saying to take chance like you are playing the lottery, or you are betting in a casino! Please don’t do that! Remember too much risk equals imbalance in life. When you are taking a risk, make sure it’s a calculated risk. If you are preparing to launch a business, study the market, do your research! If you are going skydiving, read the guidelines, study and make sure you pay attention at the training sessions. We might not know what the outcome will be but we want to make sure the odds are in our favor. Chance favors the prepared.

Think about it, you have one life and limited time to achieve certain goals. Would you rather just fit in or achieve your goals whether it be Health, Wealth, Relationship, and Education. Take a risk, the odds are better than you think. Failing is far more productive than doing nothing at all!

Thanks again,

DLA